I'll wait for you as long as it takes for you to see,
It seems the devil's got a piece of you heart...
And you can't see that you're beautiful
Sometimes, i feel pathetic for the way that i am. For the way that i love. I idly wonder, will someone out there ever appreciate my overbearing tendencies instead of become overwhelmed by the way that i am? Is it bad the way that i am? For loving the way i love?
People have told me, i've heard it several times: "You're emotionally unstable", "You're hella sprung", and so on and so forth. (Actually...that's sort of the only things i've heard, but they sort of make me wonder. I had to check what "sprung" was to see if i should be insulted by that comment or not. In the context that it was said, i felt like it was more like an insult. Here are three denotations of sprung via urbandictionary.com:
1) sprung is when you are falling in love, when you can't live without him/her.
2) being soo much much in love that you would do anything for that person or thinking about them all the time.
3) The act of being completely enthralled by one person. To have been touched in such a way that you can't get them out of your mind. You desire their sex, their touch, their presence every hour of every day.
Well i sort of had a general idea of what that term meant. When i was told that, i was a little bit confused as to why his tone sounded insulting. I asked, "What's wrong with that?..." I guess i can't see the problem in that because that's how i love. Towards him at least. That's how i love towards him. I see what this person is getting at though. What is my life besides him?
It's not much i guess. What can i make of my own life asides from him? According to these three denotations of "sprung", i can conclude the following: Yes, I'm very much in love. I'd prefer not to live without him, i'd do anything for him, and i guess you can even say i have a desire for him all the time.
Do you see how that can be so overwhelming? What has this guy done to my mind, my heart, my soul...? I've become puddy. Stripped completely of my pride. Here i am, night after night...wishing, hoping, wanting. Begging, pleading, apologizing. Have i done something wrong? Overbearing.
As if i'm not pathetic enough, i willingly put out my flaws out there for all to see. I write of how i'm sad, how i'm hopeful, saying what i can offer. Pouring it all out, to the public. Is this anyone's business?
I suppose you can consider this a warning.
♥
p.s. He's a good guy. Take my word for it. He makes me happy.
Put your guard down and let me in
