Concrete Wall

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Sweat

I've been sick for the past 2 weeks, and couldn't go to the gym and workout due to my illness. Last week i was actually starting to feel better, but would get tired easily so i didn't feel up to par to work out. So after being sick for about two weeks, boy did it feel fucking great to get back in it. Unfortunately, my mom is going to be leaving for a month for vacation and i don't think i'll be able to go to the gym...for a whole month. Perhaps i'll go with my friends or something. 

Is it weird that i sort of love sweating sometimes...specifically when i'm in the sauna. It just feels to invigorating, in a way. I'm not sure how to really explain it. Sweating when it's humid on a hot summer's day is not the type of sweating i like though. Haha.

I'm asked why it is that i'm so determined to go to the gym, like "one day wont hurt to miss" because after all i need to gain weight, not lose it. I'm not going to lose weight, i'm just going to be fit and tone up. But another thing is that, it makes me feel great about myself. If someone was to ask me what my hobby was, i think i'd have to say it is to work out. Someone told me though that it's not really a hobby...well i really don't have anything else i enjoy doing more than this. It's the endorphins i'm striving for.

And on a somewhat relatable note (since i'm talking about working out), here's a quote from Steve Maraboli's book, Life, the Truth, and Being Free. I found what he had to say really beautiful and inspiring.

"Get Off The Scale! You are beautiful. Your beauty, just like you capacity for life, happiness, and success, is immeasurable. Day after day, countless people across the globe get on a scale in search of validation of beauty and social acceptance.
Get off the Scale! I have yet to see a scale that can tell you how enchanting your eyes are. I have yet to see a scale that can show you how wonderful your hair looks when the sun shines its glorious rays on it. I have yet to see a scale that can thank you for your compassion, sense of humor, and contagious smile. Get off the scale because i have yet to see one that can admire you for your perseverance when challenged in life.
It's true, the scale can only give you a numerical reflection of your relationship with gravity. That's it. It cannot measure beauty, talent, purpose, life force, possibility, strength, or love. Don't give the scale more power than it has earned. Take note of the number, then get off the scale and live your life. You are beautiful."

Although i'm not striving to be skinnier, i'm aiming to gain weight and hoping to maybe even become thicker. I don't think that's really all that possible though because of genetics. Whatever the case, this is beautiful what Maraboli had to say. Skinny or fat, we all have our insecurities.

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With A Bang

I could say so much about 2012, but i'm not going to because my year pretty much went down the drain. My last month of 2012 was a real joy though, i can say that at least! My last couple weeks of 2012, was more than pleasant. Spent them mostly with my lady friends that will soon be leaving me for school again very shortly. 

 Went to Tram's on Christmas Eve, to bake apple hand pies with her at her house because my oven was broken. The whole process took us about four hours, and they turned out good! I plan to make more when we fix my oven. Prior to baking with her, we went and had breakfast (during noon) at IHOPS. The strawberry cheesecake pancakes and banana bread french toast is delicious as fuck. I'm going out with her again tomorrow. :)

 Had a "girls night" with my favorite girls, Christina and Tina. Every night with them is always a fun one. And our girl nights always end up not really being a girl's night. I might hella people, whom are all very nice. Good night, good company. Always. :)

 The eve of New Year's Eve, i spontaneously went Ice Skating with Blam, Lisa, Tim, and Ayejay. Prior to this, i haven't gone ice skating since i was probably 11 or something? Well i remembered it being a whole lot easier. It took me a while to get a hang of it again, but i got it. I almost fell four times, which would have been really bad. The boys really had a blast, it was cute almost to see them enjoy them selves ice skate. Ice skating really does put a smile on your face though. We went to wingstop afterwards, i was so hungry and wingstop has never tasted so fantastic. Lisa and i shared, and we ate every single chicken wing, and all our fries, and Aye Jay's fries. I say this because usually i get sick of the chicken, or am too full to finish up all the fries and then some. 

Oh New Year's Eve though! Sold my ticket to Pop the night before, super last minute. Thank goodness my night went out well, otherwise i would've just been so regretful. Spent the evening with my lovely Tina. ♥ We dressed up in our cute dresses, and went out together. Love her! Well originally we were going to party hop, but we ended up liking and staying at the first party we went to that evening. I gave this girl (right) her first kiss. Oh my gosh, it really was something. If i knew she's never kissed a boy, i wouldn't have asked her to give me a kiss for New Years. She was super drunk, i was super drunk. But before you start thinking anything, it was just a peck on the lips. Very innocent. 

 Mmm fancy.

And i ended my year with a bang nonetheless. Once again, a good night with good company. Definitely can't complain. 

I'm ready for what 2013 has to offer. So far though, i've been sick for the first week of it. Such a bummer, but i'm almost better! As soon as i'm healthy again, i'm taking in life. I plan to just live day by day, i'm learning to calm down and not stress myself out with worrying so much about planning things out moment by moment -- instead i need to relax and live the moments. Someone pointed out to me that i worry too much about things. Perhaps. Well whatever the case. Just day by day, and i'm not planning on putting up with any bullshit of any kind. Much love.

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